Children are the most meaningful thing we will leave in our passing – their character a legacy they in turn will leave in their children.
We should be mindful of this reality, this responsibility – more attentive to promoting their welfare and growth than our own or personal accolades.
Natural born mimics, impressionable, sponges soaking up all they see and hear while relying on others to show them the way – trusting and dependent.
I think it is important to encourage self reliance in children when they take those first hesitant steps towards independence, making decisions, and asserting themselves as individuals.
That’s where parental guidance and wisdom come into play in striking an age centric balance.
I have some real problems with dysfunctional parents, I don’t care what excuse they offer.
Pregnant women smoking, drinking, or doing drugs cannot be justified under any pretense.
Nor can that of a layabout do nothing father doing any of the above, the only thing worse is man who physically abuses his woman or children or abandons them, the same can be said of any woman doing likewise.
A reality of these times is children having children, some of these “children” may be in their early teens or even twenties, thirties, and forties – for too often age isn’t a barometer of maturity, and mores the pity.
There are numerous “solutions” offered, but it all comes down to breaking the cycle on an individual level and then paying it forward.
I’ve known of people who have done drugs or alcohol with their children – I still don’t know what thats about – it’s a good thing to be friends with children, but you cannot be a true friend without being a parent first and a safe haven.
The responsibility isn’t to be a drug doing alcohol drinking best bud, it is to provide and teach, to love your children and insure they are aware of that.
It isn’t a mother’s responsibility to sexualize their daughters at an early age with cosmetics or revealing adult clothing – nor is it a fathers responsibility to regale his son with innuendos regarding women or break his neck ogling a woman they pass.
This is a show and tell world replete with an abundance of posturing, with the influences that exist I guess it has become evitable, participation has not, that remains a choice, and people need to be attentive to the choices they make.
I’ve mentioned in another blog a man I call a friend, a man who established a small non denominational country church – a man whose heart knows no limits.
One time he approached me telling me of a man and his homeless family basically living in their car who were passing through, the children were hungry and so the man went to a local market asking if he could sweep up or do something for a few items of groceries – he was turned down and basically derided for being the position he was in.
A little later he returned and attempted to steal a loaf of bread and some lunch meat, the manager, the “upstanding” member of the community, had him arrested leaving the woman and children to fend for themselves.
We got that man out of jail, even had a cop sheepishly slip us a few bucks to pass on to them.
My friend and I confronted the manager who did little more than bluster and go on about “those” kind of people, if it hadn’t of been for my friend he might of had to get me out of jail as I was increasingly inclined to drag the manager outside.
In the end we helped them on their way.
Was that a man a thief and providing the wrong example to his children? Not in my opinion – what he was was a desperate man who placed the immediate welfare of his children above his own.
Such desperation should never exist in a country as affluent as this one is.
People may interpret his actions and the events that transpired in a different manner, their right to do so, but they should also consider for a moment what they would have done in the same circumstance.
Last I heard they are settled in another state and doing well, that in my opinion is what is important, not a loaf of bread and a package of lunch meat.
Some people are just thieves and neer do wells, doesn’t matter if they have children or not, when they get caught jail is the right place for them…..the same can’t be said of others.