8 comments on “IRENE BEDARD

  1. Rezi, There seems to be no simple answer or solution, to address the Genocide our family members were subjected to, and the pain and anger that has been passed on throughout the generations. Have boarding schools, and conditions on the rez due to Government policies played a part? Absolutely. But we can’t continue to use that as an excuse to abuse our own. Until we heal ourselves, individually, we will continue to transfer our anger onto our own people; our wives, mothers, fathers, elders, and children. We are not perfect, we all have our human flaws, but abuse of our own people is the greatest abomination.

  2. Anakis:
    Some of the things addressed in the blog probably anger a few people, but if
    that anger translates to recognition and addressing the issues rather than
    denying or avoiding them it will be a good thing.
    ” but abuse of our own people is the greatest abomination.”- this is it in a
    nutshell, and the perpetuation of every wrong committed against us.
    How does one reconcile talk of traditions, inherent strength, and of being
    warriors on the one hand and on the other seek to exonerate such abominations
    with talk of being victims?
    Is that meant to imply that we are little more than marionettes whose strings
    are pulled to make us act in a way contrary to the things we say? I completely
    reject that, and yet remain mindful of the realities.
    If realities circumvent personal behavioral choices then we may as well just
    lay down and forget about it-and that I think is what is happening to no small
    degree-too much acceptance, too much laying down, too much posing.
    Posing, which I think is a learned behavior from internet liberators whose
    bread and butter it is.
    Let a one of them devote a tenth of the time to the issues of rape and abuse
    that they do to promoting themselves and I’ll say they have done a good thing-
    until such a time to hell with everyone of them.
    I am stunned by the number of chiefs, medicine men, and leaders we have
    now-in all our combined history we have never had so many. Who among them
    speaks to these issues-which take the nations to task over them?
    Do the pitiful few who may receive the same air time, the same number of
    “fans” on FB- are they listened to as avidly as the wannabes? Wannabes who
    amount to little more than minstrels singing a familiar tune and collecting the
    coins tossed to them.
    You’re absolutely correct in that there are no easy solutions-but they begin
    with rejecting the bs and taking personal and communal responsibility.
    Life isn’t about commuting from one photo op to another, or grinding out
    videos one after another-if there’s time for that then there’s time to get out
    of the ivory tower into the community and do something whether there is
    a film crew on hand or not.
    That’s what native pride is about-the rest of it is read from a script.

  3. Here is huge article enlightening this story and giving some more details…
    http://www.womanist-musings.com/2010/12/irene-bedard-open-secret-of-domestic.html

    Irene moved to Alaska in an attempt to flee a horrific domestic violence situation. For 17 years, she suffered abuse, both sexually and physically, at the hands of the one person she should have been able to trust implicitly, her husband.

    The years of abuse left not only her body, but also her spirit and mind, battered. The abuse had been so pervasive, her health began to decline, rapidly. Her doctor began tests to detect cancer, unaware of the abuse. As heinous as the physical and mental tolls were, they were not the only price she had to pay.

    And this is something to answer- big one…

    by Deborah P.

    I want to know why a man can speak out about time with his children, and children cannot speak out about needing time with their mother.
    I want to know why men have absolute rights to make demands on a woman and child he has not cared for, and a woman has to fight for the child she has borne and raised…

    I WANT TO KNOW WHY A MOTHER AND A CHILD HAS NO RIGHTS TO BE TOGETHER, AND ANY MAN WHO CLAIMS TO BE A “FATHER” CAN SAY WHATEVER HE WANTS WITHOUT PROVIDING ANY PROOF, and he can TAKE A CHILD, OR CHILDREN, AWAY FROM THEIR MOTHER, I WANT TO KNOW, THE MOTHERS WANT TO KNOW, AND THE CHILDREN WANT TO KNOW – who do we ask, because we’re not allowed to speak in court without legal representation, and most of us can’t afford lawyers because we’ve been busy buying formula and diapers and toys and other necessities for OUR CHILDREN! I want to know, mommies want to know, and babies want to know WHY ARE YOU TAKING OUR CHILDREN AND GIVING THEM TO OUR ABUSERS?

    WHY?

    (of course that question applies to abusers not all men:D)

  4. stonefeather: I’ve never understood the abuse thing and I suppose there
    are a variety of “psychological” profiles-seems to me if a man wants to
    engage in punching someone he should do so with another man where
    it could at least be competitive.
    We see the label coward applied a lot and there must be something to that,
    but I’ve known of men who would hit another man just as readily as they
    would a woman-my father was one of those.
    He loved to fight, and was indiscriminate in selecting his opponents-man,
    woman, or child, it made no difference. Ultimately it was about dominating
    and speaks to the heavily flawed individual he was. Add alcohol to the mix
    and he was not only volatile, but dangerous.
    He was a great one in the aftermath for transferring blame to the object of
    his anger-they made him do it, They deliberately provoked him-difficult concept
    for a child to grasp, and one as a child I bought into until about the age of six or
    seven when I began attempting to take him on, didn’t work out well but fortunately
    by the time I was twelve or so he moved on.
    To champion one woman is not to ignore others-there isn’t or shouldn’t be a competition in doing so, or be dismissed as being just one woman, for they are all part of a common fabric.
    Individual threads that share the same joys and tribulations- for too many the frequency of joy has been diminished and overshadowed by misery, for too many the color they contribute to the fabric is that of blood-the blood of abuse in the many forms it takes.
    This is a world that is overwhelmed by numbers and statistics, numbers and statistics that blunt the senses and hinder emotions, they are too commonplace.
    But it is this very commonality, the incessant daily flogging of numbers and statistics that should galvanize not only the nations but all people everywhere to say enough.
    As men we are better able to defend ourselves-but the higher calling is to defend our women, children, and old ones-not to become instruments of their misery, nor to allow another to.
    It wasn’t all that long ago the men and women of the nations would stand and fight alongside one another-now it is more the norm to fight with one another with the children caught in the middle.
    It wasn’t all that long ago an abusive man was held in low esteem, now he is a warrior who rules his domain. It wasn’t all that long ago if his woman or a family member was raped or abused he WOULD do something about it-now there’s an even chance he will join the perpetrator(s) as an accuser further diminishing the victim.
    A great sickness has descended upon the nations, and all the feel good videos and high talk aren’t going to make it right-only we as men can assist in doing this by standing next to our women and fighting a common threat again.
    That would take courage and honesty-the courage to face reality and what we have allowed to become the new traditions of abuse, neglect, and assault, and the honesty to admit it.

  5. I would add an additional thought to all this as follows:
    It hasn’t escaped my attention, nor hopefully that of others, that
    facilitators of declared republics who have in the past imposed
    themselves to declare a state of emergency, or others forming
    “exploratory committees” with the thought of seeking tribal office,
    have neither declared a state of emergency dealing with this issue
    of abuse or formed committees to look into it.
    This issue of abuse and rape has evolved into a catclysmic event
    wreaking havoc as surely as any natural phenomena. If severe weather
    qualifies as a state of emergency this does as well.
    This is not-repeat, NOT, an issue to be politicized for personal
    gain or to enhance ones celebrity, though I’m sure some could turn
    it to that.
    If any would seek observor status at the UN dealing with indigenous
    matters the real service for the “love” of matriarchy and “all women”
    would be that of a witness to testify regarding the epidemic nature of
    physical and sexual abuse-again though as I previously stated that
    would require courage and honesty.

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